“I love you forever” is not something you just say without any meaning behind it. When you commit to loving someone for the rest of your life, you commit to the ups and downs, the good and the bad, and you vow with certainty to maintain that love. So what does it mean when you promise someone that you love them forever? Here’s what you’re getting into if you decide to love and care for someone long-term.
- They mean everything to you. Everything else in your life just fits perfectly now that they’re in it, and that makes it easier for you to love them forever. While you’re still sure to maintain your independence and nurture relationships outside of the one you have with each other, you also know that your life wouldn’t be complete without your partner and you don’t even like to think about it.
- It means you’re loyal to them. Loyalty and love go hand in hand. You can’t love someone only when it’s convenient and it fits into your life on your terms. You recognize that your feelings for them and loyalty to them extend through the good times and not-so-good times. You’re there to provide all the support they require without flinching or doubting that being with them was a mistake.
- You appreciate them for the little things and the big ones. You’re not looking elsewhere because you’re confident that there is nowhere else that could possibly be better than where you are with your partner. You’re content with being with them and support their passions and dreams and know they offer the same in return. Ultimately, you’ve decided to make expressing gratitude a routine part of your life.
- You see them as a fine wine that just gets better with time. Loving someone forever means accepting that the longer you spend together, the stronger your connection will become. You wake up with a smile and the knowledge that you made the right decision in picking them. When you reflect on the past with warm feelings and go back in hindsight, you realize that somehow, you love them even more now than when you first fell for each other.
- You don’t expect too much from them. You have reasonable expectations of the one you love. You don’t need them to go through hell and high water just to prove their love for you. You don’t expect perfection and certainly don’t hold them to unreasonably high standards clouded by fantasies. You love them just the way they are.
- You connect with them. Without the need for words, you understand their body language and how they’re feeling. You know what they need and can connect with them on all levels. There’s a sense of alignment and closeness between you and them that goes beyond physical attraction, having fun together, small talk, or even having similar ideas. You have a deep soul connection with them.
- You understand their vulnerability and accommodate it. To love someone in perpetuity requires an awareness of their frailties as well as the ability to manage them appropriately. You also want them to share those moments with you so that you can be there for them when they need a shoulder to cry on. You want to carry their burdens and make it lighter for them. When they need support, you want to be the very first one in line to give it to them.
What “I love you forever” really means
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- You overlook their shortcomings. Who isn’t a jerk sometimes? It happens to the best of us. This is where the concept of love comes into play. When you love someone forever, it means that you can accept things about them that may not change or are certain to remain the same. You’re able to overlook their annoying personality and excuse their excesses to the point where they start to make you laugh. You develop such a high tolerance for them that their flaws begin to matter less. You love them because of those imperfections rather than in spite of them.
- It means focusing on their good side. You’re aware of their good qualities and constantly remind yourself of the reasons that led you to fall head over heels in love with them in the first place. As a result of your love for them, you’re only able to recall the wonderful qualities that they possess and you can sing their praises to anyone who will listen whenever you get the chance.
- Everything that happens to you has to be shared with them. You find yourself wishing they were there alongside you wherever you go. They’re the first person you want to tell about your successes, failures, and everything in between, whether they’re minor or monumental. You have no qualms about disclosing anything to them, including the extent of your financial success. They’re your biggest cheerleader and it feels amazing.
- You’re never tired of them. Regardless of how long the two of you have been together, you always have the desire to snuggle back up in their arms at the end of the day. You love the sex, but it’s not always about that. In fact, that’s just a small part of it. You enjoy their company, the conversations, pillow talks, the silence, and simply hearing their heartbeat because it’s the only place that makes you feel like you’re home.
- You hurt and heal. Researchers have discovered a strong link between social and physical pain, which explains why love and heartbreak can be felt so viscerally at times. It’s never happily ever after because it’s not a scripted film. Love hurts in real life, but this is where your love is put to the test. How you handle the challenges you face together will determine how long forever is for you. In most cases, surviving the storm strengthens your love. Remember that love can hurt even when you’re not in an abusive relationship. Even healthy relationships can cause aching discomfort at times, but the good news is that you can heal and emerge stronger. That being said, don’t kid yourself into believing a toxic relationship is one you should stick with. Be honest with yourself.
- You’re willing to make sacrifices. While there are certain things you should never compromise on like self-respect and your hopes and dreams, love necessitates giving up certain things. When you truly love someone forever, you find yourself more willing to make sacrifices in order to spend the rest of your life with them. You do this without much thought because you care about the other person and want the best for them.
- You want to grow old with them and maybe start a family. Whenever you picture your life 10, 20, or even 30 years in the future, they’re right there by your side. This only applies if you’re someone who’s always wanted to have kids, of course, but maybe you even fantasize about having kids together and raising little ones who are a combination of the two of you in one little body (or multiple little bodies). You’ll be curious to know what your babies would look like and what parenting would look like for you both. Starting a family becomes appealing if you find that person you want to love long-term.
- You’re committed to always showing you love them. According to The Happy Couple author and psychotherapist Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., “The act of showing matters because we don’t say those three little words as often as we should.” To truly love someone for all time, you must demonstrate your feelings for them through your actions each day. There will be times when you’re not as consistent as you know you should be because life happens, but generally speaking, the way you behave towards your partner should always mirror your feelings for them. That’s what “I love you forever” really means.