After dating a guy for 3 months, it’s pretty much time to make a decision on whether or not he’s worth it. To do so, you need to know these things about him—and you definitely should by now.
- If he’s still on dating apps It’s not abnormal for people to leave dating apps on their phones even after they start dating exclusively. It’s 2023, and people are all about keeping their options open for as long as possible. Being only 3 months into dating someone isn’t long enough to say “I love you” for everyone, but it is long enough to ponder where your relationship is heading. If the guy you’re dating is still on a dating app, you should assess what that means for your relationship, call him out, or hop back on yourself until you’re ready to take it to the next level.
- If he wants to date exclusively or hook up with other people You might have serious feelings for each other but that doesn’t mean that you’re ready for commitment even if you have been dating for 3 months. Also, since guys tend to have a harder time with a commitment, it’s essential for you to find out the status of your relationship. I’m not saying you need to rush and put a label on it but you might want to know whether you can expect to share your time with other women.
- If he calls you his girlfriend to other people If you guys have decided to be exclusive, how comfortable are you with him calling you his girlfriend? After you’ve been dating for 3 months, this shouldn’t feel weird or awkward. You might not care about this but some of us don’t want labels on a relationship until it’s really a sure thing. Labels can make things messy and complicated, and invoke commitment. Be sure you’re ready for all of that.
- Whether or not you vibe with his friends In one of my previous relationships, I didn’t really vibe well with the dude’s friends. By 3 months into dating him, I kind of knew that I didn’t like their group but I justified our situation for other reasons. They say you are who you hang out with and if you don’t like his friends, it’s possible that at some point you might not like him either for similar reasons. Your relationship with his bros is a big indicator of your relationship with your guy.
- If his communication style aligns with yours The chase is a part of many relationships in the beginning but don’t get so caught up in the cat and mouse game that you don’t pay attention to his communication style. You should know if he’s naturally responsive or wants more space than you prefer in your romantic relationships. You need to know if his style works for you because people rarely change. If it’s not happening in the first 3 months of dating, it’s not going to change down the line.
- If he’s trustworthy and reliable Does he show up on time to dates? Is he honest with you? Do you have any doubts or suspicions about him? If so, you may want to reconsider whether you’re going anywhere. While trust does strengthen over time, a person’s trustworthiness and reliability are qualities they should display from the get-go.
- If his bad habits are forgivable If you spend a lot of time with a guy, you usually get clued in on some of his bad habits. Does he drink excessively when you go out to the point where he’s always blacked out? Does he spend money recklessly? Is he super messy? Pay attention to these things within the first three months and decide whether you can deal with them or not.
- If his values and morals match your own I’ve pursued relationships outside of the 3-month period with guys who had shady values because I tried to convince myself that they would change, it would get better, or maybe I didn’t know the full picture. Here’s the thing: the first three months can be a whirlwind, especially if your emotions are all over the place or if you’re super infatuated with a dude. Don’t let those feelings completely overtake your common sense! The first whiff of shaky values is an opportunity for you to decide if he’s on your level.
- If his politics bother you Politics aren’t the sexiest topic, but it is important to figure out if you agree or if you can deal with disagreeing on certain political issues. The sex might be great, but if he believes in something that you can’t get behind or move past, it might not be worth it. If you’re like me, your political preferences are tied to core pieces of your identity. I’m not saying that you can’t date someone with a different political preference, I’m saying be on notice about it so you can find a way to make it work for your relationship if you want to date him long-term. If, after 3 months of dating, you have to avoid the topic of politics like the plague, that’s a problem.
- How well you get along with his family This is hands down one of the most important elements of any relationship. If you stand any chance of making it as a couple, you’ll need to get along with his family. If not, it will drive a massive wedge between you and you won’t last long. After dating him for 3 months, you should have at least met a few of his family members and interacted with them a bit. What’s it like? Have they welcomed you with open arms? Is there tension there? This will play a big part in how things go.
- If he sees himself with you long-term Assuming you’re pretty sure he’s relationship material after 3 months of dating him (which you should be if you’re still seeing him), it’d be nice to know that he feels the same. You haven’t rushed things. Dating for 3 months is a fair amount of time to get a feel for the other person and know whether or not you’d like something more long-term. Not saying you should be getting engaged, but you should be sure about a semi-permanent commitment by now.